Protecting What Matters Most

3 tips to remember when divorcing a narcissist

On Behalf of | Mar 19, 2024 | Divorce

Divorce is an emotionally challenging time. You have to think about every aspect of your life and try to determine how to handle each in turn. While this can be difficult even when a divorce is amicable, the difficulty increases if you’re walking away from a narcissist.

There are several things you can do when you’re in this position because normal divorce tactics likely won’t work. A narcissist believes the world revolves around them, so counting on them to be decent during a divorce isn’t usually possible.

Control your emotions

Divorcing a narcissist requires careful management of your emotions. Narcissists often thrive on creating emotional turmoil, using manipulative tactics to provoke reactions that they can exploit to their advantage. Staying calm and composed is crucial, avoiding any actions or responses that could be used against you in legal proceedings. Maintaining emotional control helps to minimize the narcissist’s ability to manipulate the situation, allowing you to make clear-headed decisions.

Document everything

When divorcing a narcissist, it’s essential to document everything. Narcissists may lie, manipulate facts or present false narratives to gain an advantage in divorce proceedings. Keeping detailed records of interactions, financial transactions, and parenting issues is critical. This includes emails, texts, voicemails and any other forms of communication. Documentation can serve as valuable evidence to counteract the narcissist’s attempts to distort reality and can be instrumental in legal battles over custody, finances, or property.

Prepare for a long-term battle

Divorcing a narcissist is rarely a quick or straightforward process. Narcissists often view divorce as a battle to be won rather than a negotiation to be resolved amicably. This mindset can lead to prolonged legal disputes, as they may use delay tactics, refuse to compromise or challenge agreements at every turn. Preparing mentally and financially for a long-term battle is crucial.

Working with a lawyer who’s familiar with what it takes to successfully navigate high-conflict divorces can provide the strategic guidance needed to weather the complexities of divorcing a narcissist. Setting realistic expectations and developing a long-term strategy that prioritizes your well-being and the well-being of any children involved is important.


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