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Parallel parenting: Considerations for this parenting style

On Behalf of | Jun 20, 2023 | Divorce

Separation or divorce often challenges parents to determine the most effective child custody arrangement. Traditional co-parenting strategies may not always be feasible, particularly in high-conflict situations. In such cases, a form of co-parenting known as parallel parenting may be more suitable.

Parallel parenting is an arrangement where parents minimize their direct contact with each other yet remain deeply involved in their children’s lives. They operate independently during their designated parenting time, which can help reduce potential conflicts. While parallel parenting has advantages, it also has certain disadvantages that must be considered.

Advantages of parallel parenting

One of the primary advantages of parallel parenting is the reduced exposure of children to parental conflict. With minimal direct interaction between parents, children are less likely to witness arguments or tension that could negatively impact their emotional well-being. Parallel parenting can also provide a sense of security and stability for children. They can spend quality time with each parent without feeling trapped in disputes.

Parallel parenting allows parents the emotional space necessary to heal after separation. There’s less need for direct communication, which can be particularly beneficial in high-conflict situations or where one or both parents need time to resolve lingering emotions. As time progresses, there could be a change in how much contact is present between the parents once emotions settle down.

Disadvantages of parallel parenting

Parallel parenting does have its downsides. A lack of direct communication and coordination between parents can lead to inconsistent parenting styles, rules and disciplinary practices. This inconsistency can be confusing for children and potentially counterproductive. There’s also a greater chance for misunderstandings or miscommunication concerning the child’s needs, schedules or other pertinent matters.

Ultimately, you have to determine what’s best for your children. This isn’t always the easiest for you, but knowing that you’re making the best decisions for your children may be beneficial. Once terms are set for parenting, ensure they’re put in the parenting plan. This can reduce the conflict in the future because both parents can refer to the document when questions or concerns arise.


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